February 14 is by common consent St. Valentine’s Day, named after the Christian martyr and established by Pope Gelasius I in 496; later in the 20^th century, Pope Paul  VI pulled him from the list of common saints, as he did beloved Christopher.  But the folk traditions are more powerful than the orthodox church and both have stayed with the people.  By the time of courtly love, the circle of Geoffrey Chaucer, the saint had become the patron of romance, and by the 15^th century it was associated with gifts of flowers, confections, and greeting cards.  Now of course it is totally commercialized.

Fine if the romantics in all of us want a day-- that is acceptable, for Febraury is such a dreary month.  It is staying with us, for as President Obama has learned in religion and customs we are tolerant and heterogeneous.  But I think that it finally time to rip the romantic fig leaf off the day, and say that it is simply a sexist holiday, and it should be a target of radical feminists, especially those denounced by Rick Santorum and those who inhabit the White House and the Executive Office Building.  The president does not have the personal courage to point this up, even though he has generally avoided Prayer Day, another of our peculiar customs.

What is the problem?  The main thrust of the holiday is what can the man in a relationship give a woman to make her happy?  Do I travel down to Kay’s jewelry and give her another trinket of my affection, or get flowers on the most high priced day florists have, or give her candy and sweets while she complains she cannot eat carbs and must follow Michele‘s grim regime of peas and lettuce.  Fine, but how about one year having the burden of gift giving put on the woman.  What can she get me, do I need a new watch, do I want a big box of chocolates, do I want flowers sent to my office to show people that I am a stud and they do indeed remember me the morning after?

Why has the mating ritual been so one way in the West?  The female live longer than we do, inherit our money, go out cougaring later on.  What about recognizing that the male of the species is not the stronger part, but is vulnerable and needs special care and at attention from the women in his life?  Another trip to Zales just adds to my burdens.

Someone asked me yesterday when I expressed these ideas why is it that women insist on engagement rings and men do not.  Should not these women drop to their knees and thank St. Anne they have gotten some guy?  In any case, Valentine’s Day (we have of course dropped the St. in our secular world) should celebrate the glories of men, and women should make a good cooked meal, pass the Bud Light, and not harass their man that day with the latest banal news.

Now I have to go out and get some flowers.

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